Monday, July 30, 2007

Torn???

it always hard to forget your love. Even harder if it is your first love. How can i choose my second love if i'm still think about my first. Who ever forget their first love. No one. And that is why it called the first. Some of it might be painful, but there got to be the first.

The road to the first love is hard. Hard enough, but i'm confident that i could have it. Or atleast i have a faith in it. The second love rather less troubled compare to the first, not to say it not hard, but still isnt complicated as the first one. My heart still occupy itself with the many it choices (that i have), but still it cant forget the first one. And that make it hard for me to choose the second.

Sunday, July 29, 2007

Good dream gone bad

i know its so lame, but hey its so me. Man the only thing that awake me from my peaceful dream was my bad dream which is soooo (not lame ) i donno what word to described it. Behold, first i must stated that the definition of bad might varies from one to another, as in my case, it is when something good happen (in dream ofcourse) has gone bad. That all. At the first stage of dream it was nice (well i take it as a sign of a somewhat a brighter future??? hell so lame) has turn into mafia style fighting (oh too much movie). I know, i know, but isnt dream is the realm where our alter-ego (or however the spelling might be and correct me if im wrong) satisfied it or our (wink wink) dark deepest secret that been surpressed by..., hurm i forgot the medical term of it, by our ego (if not mistaken).

But then, it has made me realize, where part of the dream (well u can say it sort of slide show or movie) show few of my frens that i miss them a lot. However most of it comes from my anxiety of looking for job. Most of my friend already land themselves in o&g industry, which is what im looking for and what i really want. Some are still like me, waiting and looking. And some find their calling in other industry. Isnt it good if someone could predict the future so we could prepare for the worst of it. The not knowing part is the hardest part. But still i'm bounded by choices. And those choices are killing me. For every choices will lead to a different circumstances and need me to react differently and need to be solve differently. Some are easy, some are quite hard, and some are quite a longer ways. Should i take the road that less travelled??? Whichever it is i still dont know. For if i ask the people i'm familiar with, i'll keep getting the answer that i already knows.

btw dr paul, thanks for the wish. do continue wish me well eh... and i'm back. (^^)v